Vertebrobasilar migraines/Dystonia

-i had brain therapies-and it takes 22days for 38 hours per treatments to stopped my headaches,the doctor of neurology said about the result: "i have an abnormal nerve signals and i need to be underdiagnosed-and it will take 48hours. The treatment will long to be taken in about 22days-having the test of (blood testing,brain testing,courses workshop for muscles in the brain and learning the far and near sights)i have to survive from the deep brain stimulations and to recover in good result for my artery muscles that attack my brains to begin having a migraine everytime i used to look at the lights.I don't know where i am after this therapies but all in my mind i think about you(khareen)I was cried and paralys staying inside the patient room,thinking what will happen tomorrow-but then again-i have to survive-i wanna get healed and cure my illness.I take 4 tablets of medicines everyday but i don't think if it works for me.I lost my apetite every meals i take, i just learned to drink water.darn...they cut my hair,and my voice start to lose,they take my cellphone,not allowed to drink anything only water,every midnight i am screaming because of the pain hurts me more-i believe i am not sick, the window that i always staire everytime i left alone inside my room,and it makes me weak,ugly,exhauted and fragile because of this pain,i sacrifice-i wanted to live-feel alive and be with her.but how? i'm goin crazy..

I Love Everything About You

I love how you hold me. I love how you tell me I’m wonderful. I love how you look at me funny when I say something stupid. I love how you make me happy. I love how you smile when I see you. I love how you laugh when I say something random, or stupid. I love the face you make when I snort when I laugh. I love how you ask me if I’m alright when I cant stop laughing. I love how you make me feel. I love how you tell me I look cute. I love how you like my pajamas. I love how you talk about music for hours. I love how you say sweet things to me. I love how you whisper in my ear when it’s really quiet. I love how you squeeze me so hard when I hug you. I love how I can talk to you for hours about anything, and you listen, and I listen. I love how we call each other as soon as we wake up. I love how you sound when I wake you up. I love how my dog has more sex with you than I do, just kidding. I love how you want to spend every day with me. I love how you squeeze my hand. I love how you rub my back, and kiss my neck. I love how you lay next to me, and tell me that everything’s perfect. I love how everything is perfect. I love how you see the person I really am. I love how you say we are perfect for each other. I love how you make me cry, but not because I’m upset or sad, or you hurt me, but because you made me the happiest person ever. I love how I wake up in the morning for you. I love how I anticipate seeing you. I love how you kiss me. I love how I look at the empty space in my bed, and wish you were filling it. I love how I get nervous when I see you, but feel more comfortable with you than I do with anyone else. I love how my parents love you. I love how you deal with my picky eating habits. I love how you worry about me, and take care of me. I love how you pay for me when we go places. I love how you insist everything will be alright, and make me feel at ease. I love how you keep me warm when I’m cold. I love how you give me weird looks at awkward moments. I love how you stop everything for me. I love how I’m important to you. I love how I make you happy. I love how you make me happy. I love how you make sure I stay in line. I love how I only want to be with you. I love how I only think about you. I love how I stop everything because I get distracted and have to call you. I love how you get jealous. I love how you are when you are with your family. I love being with your family. I love how I can see myself with you forever. I love how we talk about being together forever. I love how you think I have cute feet. I love how you tickle me. I love how you get mad when someone says something to upset me. I love everything about you.

A Quote For You

BANAT OF THE DAY:

"Buti sana kung lahat ng tao sa mundo ikaw-ee sana di ako matatakot kung mawala ka--ee kaso nagiisa ka lang-wala tayo magagawa jan."

MakeSence:

-Gamitin mo yung puso mo kesa paniwalaan mo ang tenga at mata mo kase babaguhin lang nito ang nasa isip mo.

NICE THOUGHT:

"bakit mo bibilhin ang isang bagay kung hindi mo naman talaga gusto-nakita mo lang sa ibang tao kaya gusto mo din magkaroon."

REAL CONVO:

Girl: maghanap ka nalang ng iba mas pa sakin.iwan mo na ako!

Boy: ayoko.

Girl: weh,nagawa mo nga dati tapos ngayon aayaw ka.

Boy: ayoko nga sabi,ang kulit mo.

Girl: bakit ayaw mo?

Boy: ilan ba ang puso ko? diba isa lang-at sayo yun-ano bang sinasabi mo na may mas pa sayo-ikaw lang naman yun..

• Ang ibon kapag pinalaya mo babalik pa rin sila sa tirahan na pinaglagyan mo-kase alam nila kung san sila mas magiging masaya-kaya kahit ilang beses mo pa sila palayain at iligaw-makababalik pa rin sila kinabukasan sayo.

• Yung kaligayahan na-isang beses mo lang sa buong buhay mo mararamdaman- <3 <3 <3  kahit araw araw ako nag-a-Update sa status ko-dadating din ang araw na-mababakante tong WALL ko.pagpatay na ako. :( 
• Minsan,gusto ko na talaga mawala sa mundo-mabura na-lalo pag nakakaramdam ako ng lungkot at takot na mawala ka. :( 
• Naging masama man ako noon-nagbabago na ako ngayon-at lahat ng yun ay dahil sayo. :( 
• Di ko nman sinabi na-ako ang maging pangarap mo-ang ibig ko lang ee-tuparin mo ang pangarap ko-at ikaw yun. :( 
• Ako yung tao na-kapag nasaktan-lalayo nalang-mananahimik-at isang araw-makikita mo-pinaglalamayan na. :( 
• Nagagalit lang ako sa tuwing pinamumukha mo sa lahat na hindi kita mahal. :( Nagbakasakali lang ako na baka bumalik pa tayo sa dati-pero sayo na din mismo galing na-hindi na yun maaayus pang muli. :( 
• Hindi naman kita niloko at pinaglaruan-di ko lang talaga napansin na-yung mga taong binibigyan ko ng advice-nagkakagusto na sakin. :( 
• Ikaw na nga yung pinakamamahal ko-sayo ko lang ginawang labing dalawa ang oras ko-at kompleto yun-lahat din naman ng tao nasasaktan kapag nagmahal-lalo na kung totoo yun-alam mo ba? nasasaktan ako kase totoo yung pinaramdam at binahagi ko sayong pagmamahal. :( 
• Kapag nasanay ka na wala ako-magiging masaya na ako-kase di kana masasaktan dahil sakin at di ka na iiyak dahil sakin-pero wag mo asahan na-masasanay ako na wala ka-kase mahirap kapag wala na yung nagpapaikot sa mundo ko. :( 
• Pagkagising sa umaga-ikaw ang inaalala-sa tuwing lunchbreak-ikaw ang hinahanap-sa tuwing matutulog-ikaw ang nasa panaginip-kaya sana-wag mo naman sabihin na-may ibang mahal ako.ikaw lang yun. :( 
• kapag nalulungkot ka-diba naghahanap ka ng ibang makakausap mo-ganun din ako-nghahanap din ako ng taong magbibigay ng payo sakin-para mas lalo tayong magtagal-kaya di ibig sabihin nun na-interesado ako sa kanila. :( 
• Di mo man nakikita ang ginagawa ko-di mo man ako nababantayan san man ako magtungo-wag ka magalala-ikaw lang ang kasama ng puso ko kahit saan pa ako magtungo. :( 
• Mas makakabuti na mamatay ako-kesa manatiling buhay at isipin mong may iba na ako.Di nako magmamahal ng iba- 
• SAD BUT TRUE: Wag mo hulaan kung uulan ba bukas o katatamtaman ang panahon-dahil umulan man o hindi-iba na bukas kesa ngayon. para mo rin hinulaan na-baka bukas mahal niya na ako-kahit alam mo na-imposible yun.
• Ano ba ang mas magandang sabihin sa taong mahal mo kapag makikipaghiwalay na siya? ->AYOKO MAWALA KA?
• ->DI KO KAYA MAWALA KA?

sa tingin nyu-may pagkakaiba ba yan?o pareho lang..

aDminwishmaSterbOy

• When I'm not there... do you think of me? When you're sad and something's bothering you... do you wish I were there to help comfort you? When you've had a long hard day... do you smile knowing that soon you'll be seeing me, and everything will seem better, even if it's just for a moment? When you lay down at night... do you look back and cherish the new memories you've made with me? And when you get up in the morning, does everything inside of you smile, knowing that this will be another day that we'll be together? because that's how I think of you baby... :'( :'(
• Not being able to hold you has got to be the hardest thing I've ever had to do. But I get to look forward to the next time you are in my arms; your smile only inches away from mine getting closer and closer until at last... our smiles meet. Something that beautiful... that's what keeps me going.
• I miss the way I used to call you and you used to call my name, I miss the way we used to talk with sweetest word ever, but most of all I miss the way you love me and my heart. I miss you...
• What I have with you is worth it. It is worth every lonely night, every tear I cry of missing you, and the pain I feel from not having you closed. It is worth it because you are my one and only. When I picture myself years from now, I see only you. No matter how painful distance can be, not having you in my life would be worse.
• If my heart had wings I would fly to you and lie beside you as you dream.
• Late at night when all the world is sleeping, I stay up and think of you. And I wish on a star that somewhere, you are thinking of me too. :(
• It's not a 'good-bye', only a long 'I'll see you later.'
• No matter how far you are, no matter how long I'm gone, you will always be with me. I will see you always as clear as day, for our love knows no boundries and never will, because you see... our hearts are one, and mine is always home.
• I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned the hard way that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, or end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's to happen next.
• Someone asked me, the other day, that if I could change five things about my life, what would I change? My answer: nothing this is who I am, who I'm meant to be. I love being me; even when I'm feeling crappy and I hate myself I wouldn't change a thing.
• Life isn't about keeping score. It's not about how many people call you and it's not about who you've dated, are dating, or haven't dated at all. It isn't about who you've kissed, what sport you play, or which guy or girl likes you. It's not about your shoes or your hair or the color of your skin or where you live or go to school. In fact, it's not about grades, money, clothes, or colleges that accept you or not. Life isn't about if you have lots of friends, or if you are alone, and it's not about how accepted or unaccepted you are. Life just isn't about that. But life is about who you love and who you hurt. It's about how you feel about yourself. It's about trust, happiness, and compassion. Life is about avoiding jealousy, overcoming ignorance, and building confidence. It's about what you say and what you mean. It's about seeing people for who they are and not what they have. Most of all, it is about choosing to use your life to touch someone else's in a way that could never have been achieved otherwise. These choices are what life's about.
• It's hard to accept, but you can't change the past. You can't go back and manipulate things to the way you wanted them to happen. Because life'd be meaningless and boring and just not worth living. But you can change the future and that's a beautiful thing about life. Yes, you will make mistakes. And yes, you will have bad days - but as long as you let the past go, you'll have such a gorgeous and bright future ahead of you. Knowing that things were meant to happen. Knowing that each day you will learn something so that you keep growing to be a better person. Life is like a rope, twined in all its complexities and yet weaved into one marvelous stream that you have the chance you use something amazing from. So grab hold of it.
• I used to think that death was the hardest thing to overcome. It's not. It's hard comparable really. Death is final. You watch the casket be lowered into the ground and you mourn, but you eventually get over it. It can take years and it hurts like hell, but it's final. that person is gone and there is no fear of a repeat. With attempted suicide there is no finality. Nothing hurts more than someone you love trying to end their own life. Nothing compares.
• If I could relive my life, I wouldn't. Cause everything I've done, I've never once regretted doing them. And everything I am is everything I was meant to be.
• God saw you getting tired, and a cure was not to be. So he put his arms around you, and whispered, "Come with me." With tearful eyes we watched you, and saw you pass away. Although we loved you dearly, we could not make you stay. A golden heart stopped beating. Hard working hands at rest. God broke our hearts, to prove to us, He only takes the best.
• 'I love you' means that I accept you for the person that you are, and that I do not wish to change you into someone else. It means that I will love you and stand by you even through the worst of times. It means loving you when you're in a bad mood or too tired to do things I want to do. It means loving you when you're down, not just when you're fun to be with. I love you means that I know your deepest secrets and do not judge you for them, asking in return only that you do not judge me for mine. It means that I care enough to fight for what we have and that I love you enough not to let go. It means thinking of you, dreaming of you, wanting and needing you constantly, hoping you feel the same way for me.

Long Quotes

Somewhere between the procrastination... and the homework... and the incessant forwards... and the friendships... and the calls to each other complaining about crushes... Somewhere between the phone calls to old friends... And the "I miss yours, the "I love yours, and the "What are we doing tonight?"... And somewhere between all of the changing and growing... Somewhere between the classes... And the skipping classes... And the studying for tests... And the pretending to study for tests... And the downright NOT studying for tests... I forgot... I forgot what high school is all about. I forgot what it meant to cry... I forgot that pretending to be happy doesn't make you happy... And that pretending to be smart doesn't make you smart... I forgot that you can't just forget the past in fear of the future... I forgot that you can't control falling in love... And that you can't make yourself fall in love... I learned that I can love... I learned that it's okay to mess up... And it's okay to ask for help... And it's okay to feel like crap... I learned it's okay to complain and whine to all your friends for a whole day... I learned that sometimes the things you want most you just can't have. I learned that the greatest thing about high school isn't the parties or the drinking or the hook-ups... It's the friendships, which means taking chances... I learned that sometimes the things we want to forget are the things which we most need to talk about... I learned that letters from friends are the most important things... And that sending cards to your friends makes you feel better. But, basically, I just learned that my friends... Both old and new... Are the most important people to me in the world. AND... without them, I wouldn't be who I am today. So this is a thank you to all of my friends... For always being there. And even if we're not on good terms or we have lost touch... I still care for you... Always and forever love all you guys.

As time goes by, life has a way of rearranging itself. People enter your life, and inevitably, they leave as well. Things have a tendency to happen that can turn your world upside down. You'll come to realize eventually, that even though things are different, you are as well.

Emo Sad Photo

Sadness is when you can't find happiness you just cry.

I Was Only Chasing Dreams

I walk alone to this unknown place town

Just realize nobody ever is around I own

So i kicked the stone i was passing by

Now is the best saddest of my day

I looked at every car pass through me

Avoiding every person looked at me

Unlike the dog who enjoy following me

while other people behind me not anymore

I wake up from a nice dream of mine

That you and me is like a princess and prince

You are my princess and i am your prince

living in a fairy land we ever dream before

But you told me that i was only chasing dream

I wake up from a good and great dreams

That you and me are like a king and queen

You are my queen and i am your king

living in a castle with a lot of soldier

But you told me that i was only chasing dreams

One day i was with my friends in college

They aske me "what's goin on with you?"

I answer "nothings it's a part of growing up"

But they demand and said "na!you change a lot."

Don't stay in one place just travel around.

I wake up from a good and bad nightmaire

That you and me is only a dreamer 

You are my dream and i am your nightmaire

Living in the mind that chasing everything

But you told me to stop chasing dreams

And after a long dreams when i am sleeping

I wish to never wake up again and live inside my dream

I wish for nothing but the best for you since then

But you prove that i was only dreams for nothing to be true

For nothing to be real,so i stop and end up my life chasing all my dreams for you.

Tagalog Quotes

• Di nalang siguro ako aasa na may magmamahal pa sakin ng lubos.kahit nga sarili kong pamilya di ako magawang mahalin o pahalagahan-wala na sila pakialam sakin ibang tao pa kaya.ANGSAKLAP!
• Ganun ba talaga ako kasama-na di kaya paniwalaan kahit nasasaktan ako.hayst.worthless.
• Wala-naikwento ko lang sayo-di naman ako nagpapaawa.
• Ang buhay ko-mas masaklap pa sa isang taong namatayan ng minamahal-kase ako buhay na buhay pa pero gusto ng mamatay ng mga tao sa pailigid ko.Masakit pero ganun talaga-kailangan lang gawin ee pagbigyan sila.
• Alam mo ba yung pakiramdam na nahihirapan ka na pero di ka pa rin kayang paniwalaan ng iba? yung tipong sumisigaw kana sa sakit pero sila tuwang tuwa pa kase akala nglalaro ka lang.worst life
• Tama naman ako aa-naiisip niya lang itxt si mama pag kailangan nya pero pag sya ang kailangan ni mama-di man lang magreply-mgrereply kung tapos na yung problema-naiisipan nya din kapag abala ako-ganun sya kasama para sakin.
• Galit ako sa ate ko-galit ako sakanya pero di ko magawang ilabas-kadugo ko sya kaya ganun-pero sa tuwing nakikita ko siya-parang gusto ko tumapos ng isang buhay at unahin ang sarili ko.
• Oo na-naniniwala na ako na may diyos-kase pinaparusahan nya na ako.
• Wag ka maawa sakin aa-Ang buhay ko di naman totoong mahalaga.okay lang. :)
• My mouth is dry,all i feel this time is worse than killing life-it's just bringing me in trouble again..
• Hindi na daw talaga ako magbabago sabi ng kapatid ko-wala na daw pagasa ang buhay ko na umayos-alam mo kung bakit matigas ako-kase ayokong mabuhay dahil sa awa-pagmamahal ang kailangan ko-bat parang wala.tangina.
• Oras oras ko nararamdaman ang pagbalot ng mga ugat sa utak ko-pero di ako sumusuko -nilalabanan ko na manalo sila sa pagwasak ng utak ko.
• Buti pa ang dyablo mahalaga ako sakanya-kase pakikinabangan nya ako sa huli.

Tagalog Quotes ni Pilosopong Utak

REAL CONVO
Girl: do u love me?
Boy: no.
Girl: (cried and push the boy) i hate you!
Boy: why hate me?
Girl: cause you don't love me at all. (crying)
Boy: no,it's not what i mean.
Girl: then what is it?
Boy: i just want you to love me-only you-cause i will keep you forever if you'll do.
Girl: <3 love u 2.

aDminwishmaSterbOy
----------------------------------
NICE THOUGHTS:

-"kahit magpaanod ka sa dagat kung marunong ka naman lumangoy-di mo pa rin hahayaan na ipadpad ka ng alon sa kung saan-kase ikaw pa rin ang magdidisisyon kung saan mo gusto mapadpad."

(makesense)
aDminwishmaSterbOy
------------------------------------
BANAT of the DAY:

Girl: bakit ba selos ka ng selos jan?
Boy: ee bakit ba paselos ka ng paselos jan?
Girl: ee kase gusto ko lang malaman kung mahal moko.
Boy: ano kaba-sobrang ngseselos na nga ako ee-lalo na kung pinapakita mo na sobrang mahal na mahal moko-pati tuloy sarili mo napapabayaan mo na-dahil sakin.

wew
aDminwishmaSterbOy
--------------------------------------
ADVICE para sa mga naguguluhan:

"di mo kailangan maguluhan sa isang sitwasyon-kase kung talagang ayaw mo na-aaminin mo ito sa kanya at kung talagang may pagasa pa at gusto mo pa siya-magusap kayo-kase kahit sino pa ang tanungin mo kung ano ang dapat mong gawin-mas nakakabuti pa rin yung "KAYO MISMO ANG MAGUSAP AT MAGAYUS NG SITWASYON"

aDminwishmaSterbOy
-------------------------------------
kapag naramdaman mo na nasasaktan mo na siya-
huwag mo ng hayaan na makita pang tumutulo ang luha sa kanyang mga mata-
yakapin mo na siya at sabihin kung gaano mo siya kamahal at gaano mo iniingatan ang isang tulad niya.

aDminwishmaSterbOy
---------------------------------------
2ND CHANCE?
-ito yung pagkakataon na sobrang sinusulit mo at sobrang pinahahalagahan mo kase alam mo na wla ka ng pagasa sa susunod na magkamali ka. samantalang ang FIRST CHANCE binabalewala mo lang kase alam mo na mapapatawad ka pa.tsk tsk isipin mo..

aDminwishmaSterbOy
-----------------------------------------
Hindi tulad ng gameboy o online games ang sitwasyon sa isang relasyon kaya wag mo itong ikukumpara sa taong mahal mo-dahil hin di mo maaaring eRESTART O eNEWGAME kapag natalo ka at eEXIT pagayaw mo na.

aDminwishmaSterbOy
--------------------------------------
BANAT NG MGA PANGIT:
"dibale ng pangit marunong naman magpakatao-samantalang madalas kapag may itsura-mas pangit pa samin kung umasta."

aDminwishmaSterbOy
------------------------------------------
kung kumplikado ang relasyon niyo-hiwalayan mo na-kase di naman magiging komplikado ang isang sitwasyon kung pareho nyu pang mahal ang isa't isa.

aDminwishmaSterbOy
----------------------------------------

A Tree People

People are like a trees in the forest

They grow, wide, strong and stands alone

But trees aren't make a tears

Cause they just create a water to fall from the sky

They cry but not because they get hurt

but because they want their own happiness

They wanted to grow bigger and strong

How about the people?

They wanted to grow stronger and give up all things

Sometimes people doesnt know how to be contented

They don't know how to value things

Trees are sometimes are like immortal

When they died from disaster they starts a new life

I Wanna Grow Old With you

I was in thailand-It was march when she decided to leave their house and went far away. I planned-a lot more things to do, i want her, i love her and i wanna be with her,so i looked for a part time job to earn money to come back to philippines-it was about 3weeks while im in work- i worked hard even if i dont know how to handle it-i dont know if its work so. All i think about is her- i wanna see her,touch her,hug her and i wanna hear her voice- it's really hard cause i don't have phone to call her cause my granny doesnt give me the previledge to used phone to call someone else- i pleased her many times but she doesn't forgive me- i cried alone- i just sleep and hoping for granny's forgiveness- i said her one time again crying " i wanna talk to her granny! just give me atleast a minute just to talk with her-pleased" but i failed to get her attention-instead of giving me the phone-she used to lock me in my room-i was shocked-weak and lonely inside my room-while i keep on saying " do I deserve to have this kind of fuckin life?fuck god! why the hell did you make this to myself.i cursed you always, how do people pleased with you even they dont see you-me? dont ask me if i have faith in you cause all of my life since you make my life miserable-i start to hate you-im your sin and your my enimies." then i fall asleep.. i have dream that time- it was me in a street-walkin alone-while holding something- i dont know what it is-but i look like a weak and fragile man in my dream-maybe i am hoping for something to work out.but i always failed-i always end up crying.

After 3weeks-it was month of APRIL-i feel so excited- i have her number and all i have to do is to buy phone and sim-just to talk to her.i wanna meet her-i wanna see her smile.It was april 15-5:00 o'clock in the afternun-i was in the airport-i felt nervous and excitement-saying "yes!atlast-we will be together-when i was in the plane- i used to listened to my music and it was song title "i wanna grow old with you by westlife" i really loved to hear in that song-cause everytime i listend to it-i reminize those time we are spending all the hour in online at facebook-it was a happy moment she left me before she's gone. but i am still hoping to talk to her- i was cried and cried when my tears fall down into my chic-and i think of her all the time while i was traveling. how is she? did she eat well? is she safe? or did she make something just to be happy? i have really so many thoughts about her. then i fall asleep in the plane.....

When i was arrive-I am gladly to come back in my own country-is this philippines?I asked someone else-he answer "yup,are you foreign? I said "na,i am filipino-it was a year ago when i left this country,by the way thanks for the information-i was glad i came back here again-then the man smiled at me-saying "take care,there are so many strangers in this place." i said thanks in a louder voice cause the man is far away from me."okay sir,thanks again-same to you!"then i continue walking quickly- I envied to the other passengers, they all have sevens and relatives waiting to airport, but me? There is nothing with me that time, I never told my parents that i am going home,I'm sad but happy that I somehow, I just only think that i have to see her- i have to called her first.In an hour i am in our home- when i got there, it was my mum- She met me a slap in my face- it hurts but I admit it was my fault- She still don't forgot what prankly I could have done before she send me in thailand hell. But i admit-i accept all their blamed on me- i know and i understand them-  She can not really love me and treat as a real children. But it's okay- atleast she forgive me to stay at home even if she doesn't talk to me, all i think about is someone whom the reason why i get back home.

It was 8 o'clock in the evening-i am in my room thinking about her-i am about to give a call to her-it rang- ring,ring,ring- "hello?"said the girl in the other line-i stop-listen hard to that voice-a girl-a girl that was in my mind since the time i left my country- my heart beat fast-feeling nervous-ashame-blushing and excitement.It was her-am can't believe i am listening to her voice this time-it's like a dream so long ago that came for real and it's true-it's her voice and it's her soul speaking to me.It was the best-ever day of my life since i first listen to her voice-what else if we can see each other? maybe i will die-because of happinness.